Vicky Cristina Barcelona (2008)

Even though the title may just be the worst one in history, Woody Allen's Vicky Cristina Barcelona is funny and charming. Though not hilarious as Allen had wished, it still is visually stunning and well acted. The film makes you feel as though you actually went to Barcelona for two hours.

Rebecca Hall plays Vicky and Scarlett Johansson plays Cristina, two girlfriends who take a trip to Barcelona for the summer hence the title. There they meet the elusive Juan Antonio (Javier Bardem), a nice artist. They both fall in love with him. The love triangle becomes some other quadrilateral when Maria Elena (Penelope Cruz), a previous girlfriend of Juan Antonio, comes back to see him. And that's not even the end of it.

Penelope Cruz's acting is the best part of this film. She gives a really great performance. There aren't many actresses who can give a real tour de force performance like she can. Though the other actresses and Javier Bardem come off as a bit dry, Cruz really shines and well deserves her Oscar nomination and Golden Globe.

As I mentioned before, the film is beautiful. Though it is probably very hard to make Barcelona look ugly, when you add Woody Allen into the equation, the filmmaking reaches a new level. As Juan Antonio and the women walk around Barcelona, the viewer becomes so amazed by the sights they see. This movie actually inspired me to travel to Barcelona next summer.

Vicky Cristina Barcelona's humor may be strange, but it still is very lovable. This is one of 2008's good movies. Somewhere in the middle, the film begins to feel a bit long, but the resolution makes it better. A weird lesbian scene and great acting, this film has it all. Woody Allen has directed another good one.

Movies You Shouldn't See: Saw II (2005)

The first Saw was good, why ruin it with a sequel? Well, they did with four more (a sixth is in the making). I guess the writers decided they could just miss an NC-17 rating several more times. Saw II seems so familiar...in a bad way. Though the story has a few good twists, the bloody traps don't hold my attention as long as they should.

This time, Jigsaw is back to his perverted ways. He locks a bunch of criminals in a broken down house, but then again, why would they ever make the conditions clean? Anyway, they have to go through a series of traps in a certain amount of time in order to make it out alive without breathing in too much nerve gas. Did I mention that there's blood?

As the Saw series seems to indicate, violence is something people like to see. I never did understand why, but this movie should be no exception. One trap involves a man looking through a keyhole. When he pulls the door a little, a shotgun goes off and blows his brains out. Isn't it great that this is what our children are watching?

Other than the sadism, the movie also has godawful acting. Honestly, I would consider closing down the colleges where the actors in this went to. Every actor gives a tour de farce performance. You could have at least made an attempt to look like you were scared!

The Saw series does never end. Even after Jigsaw (SPOILERS) dies (END SPOILERS) in the third one, the series still isn't over. The second is a lead up to the even worse third one and it just seems to just go downhill from there. I'll admit, watching them once in a while with friends isn't a bad experience. Still, if you are alone and considering watching this, don't.

2001: A Space Odyssey (1968)

No, we may be in 2009 and not have HALs yet, but still 2001: A Space Odyssey is a cinematic feat. Obviously made by Stanley Kubrick, the odd scientific journey through space doesn't even make sense. Still, it is one of the best movies ever. Though I have never read Arthur Clarke's novel, I can assure, it can't be as good as this.

2001 is about a group of people looking to begin a new life in space. Together, with a computer named HAL, they search for a monolith supposedly buried in a planet. Yes, this is the movie with the silent first 30 minutes in which the apes dance around the monolith.

The movie, to say the least, is very Kubrickian. Every single scene can have no meaning at all when looked at on just the surface. Every scene can also be seen as masked with metaphor. Though the movie is definitely hard to decipher, it is worth taking a stab at trying to find its true meaning.

There are certain stretches of the movie that do grow tiresome. People with epilepsy should watch out for the 10 minute long scene in which they travel through deep space. Flashing lights abound, the scene lasts way too long and makes me feel ill. Also, the nonsensical ending is completely open to interpretation which some hate. I am neither here or there on it, but I am certain the book doesn't have the same effect.

2001 is a monolith in and of itself. A masterpiece and a stroke of genius, it is the movie that is complex and perplexes. One of the many beauties of the film is that it makes the viewer think about what Kubrick is trying to say with the surrealistic imagery. Why does he do this? Why is it necessary for us to see this? One may never know, but just like Eyes Wide Shut, the film is ambiguous. Kubrick's masterpiece shall live on forever no matter how dated it becomes.

Red Eye (2005)

Here is an example of why Wes Craven can do so much when he uses his skill correctly. Red Eye is taut and crisp clocking in at nearly an hour and a half. The claustrophobic thriller is short and to the point, but still manages to thrill the audience. Rachel McAdams and Cillian Murphy do their parts justice.

Lisa Reisert (Rachel McAdams) is on her way back to the Lux Atlantic Hotel in Miami which she owns. Her flight has been delayed for hours. Finally, she gets on the plane and meets Jackson Rippner (Cillian Murphy)-haha-and gets into a conversation with him. Things turn ugly when he kidnaps her and threatens to kill her father if she doesn't assisst him in killing a powerful politician.

Seeing McAdams' performance makes you wonder why she hasn't been in anything recently minus the flop Married Life. She gives a believable acting job which is often hard to do in an action movie. Cillian Murphy seems to have befallen the same fate. Once the attractive guy in 28 Days Later, he seems to have faded into oblivion and one has to wonder why.

Wes Craven has made a very satisfying thriller. Though it is a crossover for him, he shows that he does know what he is doing. Though the movie gets a bit far fetched towards the end, it really is a fun summer movie. When you combine a good story and Craven, movie magic can happen as we can see here.

Oscar Nominations!

And for the 81st Academy Awards the nominees for best picture are The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, Slumdog Millionaire, Milk, The Reader, and Frost/Nixon. Surprise, surprise. I still think Benjamin Button should win, but who knows? All of these are pretty good. It did get 13 nominations. Slumdog Millionaire got 10 and The Dark Knight got 8 which is righteous even if it didn't get a best picture nomination.

Who was snubbed? Revolutionary Road. It got only 3 nominations, but was expected to get many more. Doubt. Supposedly a best picture nominee, it picked up nominations in other categories. Gran Torino. Did it get any nominations?

Who were the surprises? In Bruges. I never thought I'd live to see the day this movie would be nominated for anything special. A really cool movie that got missed by many movie goers. Wanted. 2 nominations? I'm in shock! Tropic Thunder. Robert Downey Jr. is making quite a comeback! Australia. After all the negative reviews, still there is one nomination.

So who will win? I think we can agree that WALL-E will win best animation, Man on Wire will win best documentary, and that Waltz with Bashir will win best foreign film. I don't know about anything else. Is Slumdog Millionaire too buzzy? Is Benjamin Button too mainstream? Is Frost/Nixon too real? Is The Reader too controversial? Is Milk too gay? Find out of February 22nd.

Movies You Shouldn't See: The Last House on the Left (1972)

Cult classic my ass. Wes Craven's trashy first movie is honestly one of the worst movies I have ever seen. The Last House on the Left may be loved by many, but really, it is just a frenzy of violence and disgust. Craven has better movies. Why is this one of people's favorites?

The Last House on the Left is just gross. It is the supposedly true story of a teenage girl who meets up with a friend. On the way to a rock concert, the meet some seemingly friendly drug dealers. They kidnap the girls and both end up dead (one is raped). The drug dealers, looking for shelter during a storm, end up at the girl's parents' house. The film just gets even more nonsensical from there.

The bad acting and direction are understandable. To call Craven out for those two things is not even fair. It was his first movie. I can't be that hard on this movie. I mean, it was quite a feat to show violence that couldn't be shown in theaters. Then again, it is just unforgivably bad.

The problem I have with this film is that it is just absolutely absurd and distasteful. The rape scene isn't even artistic, it just is exactly what it is. The difference between the brutality of this and the brutality of Irreversible is that it isn't even close to artful. Craven learned from his mistakes, thank god, but this is for some reason famous.

The Last House on the Left is finally being remade. Though the trailer doesn't look any better than the original, I fully support it because this is an example of a film that actually needs to be remade. With A Nightmare on Elm Street, Wes Craven redeemed himself. Of course, this is a first film so I wasn't expecting anything good, but I wasn't expecting anything this bad either! Again, cult classic my ass.

Notorious (2009)

Ahhh, the first good movie of 2009. Notorious is a movie that is generic, but still has universal appeal to almost anyone. Though it does seem very one-sided, it does seem to explore most of the 300 pound bulk that the Notorious B.I.G. was. Moving and dramatic, Notorious is one of the better musical biopics out there.

Notorious is the story of the Biggie Smalls. To those of you who aren't familiar with the pop culture icon, the rapper, played by Jamal Woodward, became an instant sensation after signing with Sean 'Puffy' Combs. Not too long after, he became mixed up in the death of Tupac Shakur and eventually, his own life was taken by an unknown shooter in California. Even though he lived to be only 24, he inspired many people and even produced Lil' Kim.

The acting in this movie is spectacular, that is besides the one who plays Puff Daddy. Angela Bassett is quite good as Valleta, B.I.G.'s mother when he was still Chris Wallace. Also, Jamal Woodward does B.I.G. justice. I'm sure he would not be rolling over in his grave after this fine performance. Aside from him, there's also the one who plays the never shy Lil' Kim, whose performance sometimes is dry, but is quite believable in the end.

Even a good movie has some bad things. The biggest problem I had with this one was how generic it was. Every musical biopic seems to have a billion montages, and this one had a few too many. I don't need another one of him performing and signing some women's boobs. Also, the movie just seemed to stretch on and on. Though it was in a compact length of two hours, they could have cut about 20 minutes.

Overall, Notorious is a satisying dramatization of the rapper's life. Though the slogan may be extremely corny, the movie is not. Loaded with swearing and pot smoking, it manages to capture the audience with the reality of the performances. The tearjerker ending is a nice finishing touch to it. The film gives me a pretty good outlook on this year in movies.

Moulin Rouge (2001)

Baz Luhrmann's frenzied Best Picture nominee is one of my favorite musicals. Moulin Rouge is a clever, frenetic mix of dance, romance, and drama. The music, at least for the most part, is not original, but rather an update (actually, quite the opposite) of newer songs. Nicole Kidman and Ewan McGregor are great. Luhrmann being one of my favorite directors, never fails to astound me.

Moulin Rouge is the story of Christian (Ewan McGregor), a young man searching for love in Paris. One day, a bunch of Bohemians literally crashes through his roof and he becomes involved in a play. The lead actress they want is Satine (Nicole Kidman), a seductive dancer at the Moulin Rouge, a famous cabaret. They go there to ask her, but Christian runs into problems when he falls in love with her, but she has already been sold to the Duke even though she loves him back.

The best part of the movie is the first trip to the Moulin Rouge. The energetic scene where the characters sing "Lady Marmalade" as remixed by Christina Aguilera, Lil' Kim, Mya, and Pink is amazing. Watching the update on the Nirvana song "Smells Like Teen Spirit" is fun. It's great to see people dancing to modern music 1900's style. Then again, it's all so Luhrmann-esque.

The characters are also what makes this movie so great. Toulouse Lautrec, played by John Leguizamo, who was the famous poster artist, is beautifully acted. Also, Nicole Kidman is charming as Satine, even when the film turns ugly towards the end. Ewan McGregor is also adorable as the innocent Christian.

Quirky and charming, Moulin Rouge is a stunning classic. Updates on songs and at times corniness, Baz Luhrmann has created a great musical. Though the mood changes a lot in the second hour, it still remains good and touching. I have to say, I'm the first in line when Baz Luhrmann's The Great Gatsby is done!

Pan's Labyrinth (2006)

Pan's Labyrinth is in Spanish, with English subtitles. It is also called El Laberino del Fauno.

There are many fantasies that are so boring, but never before has dream like imagery and the horrors of real life been mixed. Pan's Labyrinth is not a G-rated fantasy as you would have expected. It is a violent R-rated venture into the dark world of Facist Spain in 1944-Guillermo Del Toro style. Fascinating special effects and great acting abound, Pan's Labyrinth is one of those movies you have to see more than once.

Pan's Labyrinth is the dark tale of Ofelia, a girl whose mother has recently married a wicked general. To break away from the harsh realities of the war, she goes to a labyrinth where one night she meets a creature who tells her she is Princess Mohana and must go through three obstacles to regain her royalty. As she completes them, she is forced to deal with the events that surround her as well as the ones inside the labyrinth.

The special effects in this film are outstanding. In the days where mostly everything is done on the computer, many of the effects were done with makeup. The best and finest example of this is the Pale Man, one of Ofelia's obstacles. He is missing eyes and is completely shriveled up. The great thing about it is that is so creepy because it looks so real. For information on how they did it, one should look no further than the excellent documentary on the DVD.

The real triumph here is Guillermo Del Toro's adaptation of the idea of a fairy tale for adults. Violence is blended with fantasy in a surreal and absurd manner. In fact, I'd say that this is the best case of this that I know of. Many of Miyizaki's films utilize this idea, but this shows happiness and sadness as polar opposites which his films fail to do.

Pan's Labyrinth is one of the outstanding films of 2006. It won three Oscars and it rightfully deserved each one. Guillermo Del Toro has produced and excellent fantasy drama that will stay with me for ages. The ending still makes me weep every time I watch it.

Eyes Wide Shut (1999)

Eyes Wide Shut was originally rated NC-17. Therfore, there is an edited R-rated version, but the NC-17 version is recommended for a more realistic experience.

Continuing on with Stanley Kubrick, there's Eyes Wide Shut. The movie is one of the strangest known to mankind. Erotic and suspensful, the director's last film is misunderstood for obvious reasons and not many critics liked it originally. Now, people have looked past the reviews and began to enjoy it.

Eyes Wide Shut starts out as a free form plot, but then finally starts to begin about 40 minutes in. Bill (Tom Cruise) and Alice (Nicole Kidman) are happily married. One night, Alice admits that she had a fantasy about cheating with another man. Bill is thrown into the idea of hatred and decides that he is going to cheat on her. Little does he know that he has just delved into the odd world of secret sexuality in New York.

The film, which was originally rated NC-17, is extremely sexual. After a certain point in the movie, just about every woman is topless or shows a full frontal. Whether this is necessary or not is a common argument, but I personally feel that it is. The film is notable for the scene in which Kidman dances nude to a Chris Isaak song. Also, the orgy scene is beyond wild and seems to stretch on forever. I think it does actually clock in at about 15 minutes all together (the movie is 159 minutes long).

Another thing that stands out for the whole movie is Stanley Kubrick's direction. It is hard to hold an audience for two hours and 40 minutes, but it is even harder to keep the erotic mood of the film for that long. Every scene seems to have this eerie lingering sexuality to it. Not only this, but the shots are also composed very well. Everything is very appealing to the eye.

Stanley Kubrick's final movie is good end to his career. A great director left us with a great fantasy-or nightmare depending on how you look at it. The actors are great, the scenes are too explicit, and the movie is a great mystery. Creepy and satisfying, Eyes Wide Shut is good cult classic.

Pictures of Movies in 2008

Memorable moments of movies. The year in pictures.

The Shining (1980)

"Herrre's Johnny!" roars Jack Torrence as chops through a door in one of the most iconic quotes in celluloid history. The Shining is one of the most creepy movies around. Most of the book gets lost in translation, but if the movie is this good, the book is even better. Still, the woman in the bathtub and the final scenes are still very memorable.

Jack Torrence (Jack Nicholson) and Wendy (Shelley Duvall) decide to stay with their son, Danny, in the supposedly haunted Overlook Hotel....alone...in the winter. Egad! Danny isn't quite normal though seeing as he talks to his finger which sometimes takes over. Yeah, it is kind of strange, but in the book it is quite different. Anyway, as the snow piles up around them, Jack's mind begins to deteriorate and crazy events begin to happen.

The only problem I have with the movie is how the book was adapted. If it's a Stanley Kubrick movie, it's going to be good, but maybe there's a reason why the rest of his movies are original scripts. Stephen King places a lot of really scary stuff in the book such as moving topiaries and a different ending that somehow didn't quite make it into the movie. For a more faithful version, look no further than the satisfying miniseries of the same name.

The movie is so famous that just about every seen is memorable. My favorite scene actually does not even appear in the book which I have praised so much. The blood flowing out of the elevator is such a shocking image that it sticks in one's mind. Also, I love the end, but of course I love the end. Who doesn't like seeing Jack Nicholson chop down doors?

Stanley Kubrick has adapted the novel well, but it could have been better. Hey, we still have a great movie here even though I can't stand Shelley Duvall's teeth. Watching the movie still gives me the chills and the lady in the bathtub still scares me. To tell any more about the movie would be a crime, so enjoy a good scare. Watch The Shining! REDRUM!

Movies You Shouldn't See: Mamma Mia! (2008)

It's too bad this film is bad because it looked really good. Unfortunately, the star studded cast wasn't even close to enough. Some of Mamma Mia's scenes were fun, but some were just energetic and boring. I will commend the film for Amanda Seyfried, but I will not commend it for making the musical into something much worse than it deserves.

Personally, I can't understand why you would make a movie anyway, but...there's Sophie (Amanda Seyfried), a girl who isn't sure which one of her mother's (Meryl Streep) three bedmates is her father. She then decides to invite the fathers (Pierce Brosnan, Stellan Skarsgard, and Colin Firth) to her wedding. Definitely Maybe, anyone?

The casting for the movie is very spotty. It ranges from Seyfried who is the upcoming big actress of 2009 to Pierce Brosnan who should never sing. When he opens his mouth to sing, it makes me want to scream. They could have at least done what West Side Story did and dub his voice! Meryl Streep is so so, but it is hard to believe she had operatic training.

The biggest problem I have is that the movie is overly peppy and somewhat exhausting to even watch. You watch one musical number and you're just tired from watching it. All the women are all just so peppy to the point where it is annoying. The guys are barely in half the movie, but when they are it is just disastrous.

Mamma Mia is a blockbuster, but I honestly don't know why. Maybe because it has ABBA music in it, but I'm not sure. Surely one of the worst letdowns of last year, Mamma Mia makes me want to just hit one of those overly energized women in the movie who randomly break out into song. Believe me, I don't care about that usually, but it just doesn't make sense!

Trailer Park 2

9: Based on the Academy Award winning short, the movie is a feature length fantasy. I'm not really sure what it's about, but it does look good. It is produced by Timur Bekmambetov (Wanted) and Tim Burton. The only test it has to stand is the length of the movie since the 10 minute short already felt a bit drawn out. A-

Watchmen: The amazing Alan Moore graphic novel comes to the screen and looks fantastic. Dark and violent, the movie seems to have lots of gripping action and looks really interesting. To me, it seems to be along the lines of V For Vendetta as our heroes are actually the villains. If there's one thing for sure it has to be better than Heroes. A

The Last House on the Left: The remake makes me feel split about it. The hokiness of the old one has been taken away, but the brutality of it remains. The only thing is that it looks very average, but we'll see what the reviews are like. C

Lesbian Vampire Killers: This actually looks funny! It looks like a fake trailer from Grindhouse and the narration on it is perfect. He says "What is the title of this movie? What else were we going to call it?". Seems pretty good. B-

Franklyn: After reading a summary for this movie, I'm still not sure what it is about, but it does look quite good. Though Eva Green is the only big name star in this British film, it seems like an enthralling fantasy. With action and intrigue, Franklyn seems good. B+

Marathon Man (1976)

"Is it safe?" asks villain Christian Szell, one of the best in cinematic history. Marathon Man is the kind of movie you just can't watch once, but you have to see it again and again. There are many scenes that stick in your mind such as the tooth drilling scene. Great acting and a pretty good adaptation of William Goldman's book make this movie as famous as it is today.

Marathon Man is about Thomas Levy (Dustin Hoffman), a student in college who suddenly becomes entangled in mystery. Soon after he meets a foreign girl who seems strange, his brother (Roy Scheider) warns him against her. Not too soon later, there is a death and Thomas comes face to face with Szell (Laurence Olivier), an evil dentist who is in pursuit of something and will do anything to get it.

It really is the acting that makes us remember this movie. Olivier as Szell is perfection when he drills into Hoffman's teeth. To some the scene may come off as corny, but really it is the acting that makes it all too real. Roy Scheider also is good even though he has a smaller part.

The movie may come off as hokey now, but in the 70's it was great. Yes, the blood is way too red and yes, there are gaping plot holes, but still Marathon Man is a fine masterpiece. William Goldman's story is beautifully adapted to the big screen in a memorable way. One of the best New York movies remains in my memory. Not only this, but it is also one of the best to come out of that decade.

Movies You Shouldn't See: Step Brothers (2008)

Well, when I saw the Will Ferrell/John C. Reilly collaboration, I wasn't thrilled. Then again, Walk Hard wasn't too bad and neither was Anchorman. Only differnce between Step Brothers and those two is that this one is awful. Step Brothers is a disjointed mess that follows no plot whatsoever and doesn't even attempt to. Its type of humor is so strange that I don't even think it for anyone, not even a die hard Will Ferrell fan.

The stupid storyline follows Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly who are united as step brothers when their parents marry. They hate each other at first (of course) and are both 40. After only 10 minutes, they decide they need a job. The plot changes just about every 10 minutes so it is pretty free form.

I think the thing I hated the most about this R-rated comedy was that it made no sense! Comedies are for people who are not as intellectual as somebody who would see foreign French movies. So if I don't have the mental capacity to understand the random time jumps (until the very end in which the writers decided to give a title card), then who can? That is a question I cannot answer.

The other thing I REALLY hated about this movie was how crude it was. I understand that comedies were meant to be crude, but not this much. There is a scene where Will Ferell places his testicles, which are so obviously fake, onto a drum set. Not only this, but the camera lingers on it hoping to squeeze a laugh out. Well, the only thing the squeezed out was a disgusted face.

If you like crude and odd movies, this is one for you. If you have a hope of seeing a good comedy, this is NOT a movie for you or anybody else. It seems like Ferrell has lost his funny and Reilly could do so much better. What agent chose this movie for them? The answer would be a very bad one.

Don't Look Now

Let me just tell you what to expect first. The movie is an eerie, strange, and erotic venture into horror. This may not be many people's thing, but it was right up my alley. Don't Look Now is a movie many people do not know. It is extremely strange and creepy mostly for its bloody finale.

Adapted from Daphne DuMaurier's short story, Nicholas Roeg's movie is the tale an unlucky couple, Laura (Julie Christie) and John (Donald Sutherland) who are still mourning the death of their daughter who has recently drowned. The two visit a psychic who seems to have visions of their daughter. John is not impressed until he begins to see his daughter walking around Venice and begins to wonder what is truth and what is fiction.

There are many reasons this movie is a cult classic, but one of them is the memorable sex scene. People today continue to wonder if it is real and not actually faked. I think there is a possibility that it might be real considering that Warren Beatty, who was currently dating Julie Christie, attempted to have it pulled from the movie. It is extremely explicit and lasts about ten minutes. Again, this isn't a movie for everyone.

To reveal the end would be a crime, but what it turns out to be is shocking and unbelievable. The finale is relentless and brutal and one begins to ponder why they had even seen the film in the first place. I mean that in the best way possible of course! It spooked me so bad that I couldn't stop thinking about for a few days. It still gives me shivers.

Don't Look Now is a strange and very scary horror movie. The reason that the 70's horror movies are so good is because, unlike now, the movies are well paced and know how to fill out two hours. Though the criticism is that they are too violent, but Don't Look Now is violent, but it is very paced which is what causes it to work. This movie is a new, odd venture into horror for many. I would suggest this to Lynch fans.